Helen Mirren, 62, has been caught on camera wearing nothing more than a bikini. She looks fab and probably has better muscle definition than many women half her age . . . but Helen . . . please put your clothes back on. I'm nearing 40 and as I get older I'm looking forward to letting go of my high maintenance lifestyle. By the time I hit 60 I want bikini's to be a distant, though happy memory. I want to be thinking about doughnuts, chocolate and cheesecake. Oh come on Helen, give a girl a break. When will I now be old enough not to look 'hot' in a bikini? When will I be old enough to eat again? I was looking forward to watching it all go south, perhaps take up smoking and indulge myself in lengthy knitting sessions whilst watching endless repeats of 'Frost' on UK Gold. I had it all worked out. But no, it's not to be, apparently at the age of 60 I'm still going to be expected to look 'hot' in a bikini. Bollocks.
I have chronic PMT and my tits hurt.
Well, that was all a bit girly . . . .