Saturday, 27 December 2008

Everything Must Go . . .

What shall we do between now and New Year? I know, why not spend some more money . . .
Some retailers are slashing prices by up to 70%. I kind of get the feeling that this is not a sign of a thriving economy, but a sign of desperation. I never go to the sales; I don't like being crushed and it's never good to look desperate . . . or crushed and crumpled . . .
My mantra for the coming New Year is to make do and mend.
Chin up, tits out . . . we will survive!

32 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

Is it possible to mend torn pantyhose, Miss Scarlet? Just asking, I don't wear it myself.

The Dotterel said...

Excellent idea, Scarlett! I'm doing the same myself (only minus the tits).

scarlet-blue said...

Dispose of pantyhose Mr Bananas, we don't need it... invest only in thick woollen tights and in Summer, of course, use fake tan or an Oxo cube...
Oxo cubes make corn-beef thighs look so much more attractive.
Sx

scarlet-blue said...

Mr Dotts: Well, okay... I can't tempt you with the tits then?
Sx

BEAST said...

Miss Scarlet , altho sadly lacking in the Tits department myself , I will be with you metaphorically . So lead on my proud young beauty

CyberPete said...

That's right, if nobody went into a state of panic we wouldn't be in this mess (at least not here).

I will brave the crowds on Monday to exchange two presents I got. I've already started drinking - I need courage.

scarlet-blue said...

Beastie: I probably have enough tits for the pair of us..

Pete: I think you may need extra padding to protect yourself from the army of bargain hunters. They looked like stampeding cattle on the news.

Sx

KAZ said...

Is it OK if I have tits up and chin out?
For personal reasons.

CyberPete said...

Oh dear!

I didn't think it would be *that* bad.

That's more than a little sad.

:: Wendy :: said...

By taking a leaf out of Scarlet's book I've managed to save hundreds of pounds, bruised arms, frozen nose, and all manner of other monstrosities. I've even managed to avoid wearing any form of pantyhose manmade fibre or silk. Life if good :-)

Kate Lord Brown said...

Dear old Woolies were selling everything today - the empty shelves, store safe, prob the kitchen sink. Will miss the pick'n'mix. As you say Scarlet - time to keep our peckers up x

Autolycus said...

"Chin up and tits out"? What sort of sale is it that requires that sort of tactic? Not sensible knitwear at John Lewis, I'll wager.

WV: parpsyn: co-ordinating the consequences of sprouts.

Ellis Nadler said...

happy 2009 to thee

having my cake said...

The sales have made circumnavigation of the M25 particularly troublesome today. Whoever thought of putting both the South-East's major shopping centres at the turn-offs on either side of the bottleneck that is the Dartford crossing? *Sigh*

Famulus said...

I shall be out at the sales thrusting my elbows into the faces of those that wish to get to the one remaining Woolworths 60% off DVD before me.

I love a good fight. Plus, it is proppin' up the economy just as the gov'ment wants us to.

However, tits. Sorry, what were you saying?

Nuvalostlamb said...

Totally agree SB - was dragged into some shopping centre in a typical towny town (no culture jus same shit you can find in any other town), by my fella... The place looked like a large flock had escaped their pens and were running amok the place jus bouncing against each other in all directions.

I wanted to get out after 5 mins....

Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

Amen to that. I make do and mend anyway. There's not much you can't fix with some putty and an old G-string.

Dave said...

I got a Waterstone's gift card for christmas. Can you assure me they won't have gone bust by Friday? Otherwise I'm going to spend it tomorrow.

Speaking of busts, keep it up!

Jade of the Jungle said...

Good plan - I'm avoiding the sales like the plague. I don't enjoy contact sport at the best of times, scrumming with strangers over the ugly bits of rubbish that no one wanted to buy the first time round isn't my idea of fun.

I'm not so good with mending though. I suppose I'll just have to make do!

x

scarlet-blue said...

Kaz: Chicken fillets! Or as we're making do... socks - I swear by them... they raise eyebrows... and a few other things...

Pete: I am a firm believer in extra padding. Everywhere. At all times.

Wendy: Sales - who needs them at this time of year?
I will have more money saving tips in the New Year. Watch this space.

Kate: I overheard this from a sweet old lady whilst Christmas shopping in Tunbridge Wells:
"Well I never knew there was a Woolworths here.." Erm...

Auty: I think they'll use any kind of sales patter these days!

Ellis: And a Happy 2009 to you too!

Ms Cakes: I reckon it must have been a man that planned the shopping centre chaos...

Fammy: TITS Fammy, that's what I was saying.. but obviously the Woolworths sale is more interesting than anything I've got to say... Goodness me, I try... I really do...

Lostlamb: Hello! and welcome. 5 mins would have been too long for me... I'm very short and I would have been trampled...

Daphne:
There's not much you can't fix with some putty and an old G-string
I think this sounds like an excellent title for a book of credit crunching tips! We should work on it together Daphne, I've already gathered together a few beauty tips, such as growing a long fringe to save money on botox...

Dave: Don't you worry, I spend time and money ensuring that everything stays up...

Jade: Some contact sports are fun and we shouldn't dismiss them all... Anyhow, I shall possibly be showing some of my mended stuff in future posts... I'm not that good at it either to be honest. Perhaps we can learn together.

Sx

xl said...

"tits out" ... always a good look, regardless of the season! :)

Best to you in '09.

ChrisV82 said...

I heard a report Christmas eve about retailers not being able to go any lower for risk of not making profit, but needing to go lower or else risking massive losses.

It's getting to the point where I'll be able to walk into a store, by a designer sweater for $13.95, and then get a $50 gift card for my next purchase.

Too bad I don't wear sweaters.

scarlet-blue said...

XL: Hello XL, it is a bit chilly for 'tits out' really, but I like to show willing...

And a Happy New Year to you too!

Chris: I think I could do with an extra sweater actually, so pass it my way... before I die of hyperthermia....

Sx

CyberPete said...

Just where do you place that padding?

scarlet-blue said...

Pete: Today Pete, I am using all padding to keep warm... it's freezing! I'm wrapped in padding.
Sx

Kevin Musgrove said...

I'm not one for crowds or retail therapy myself (though I can't resist an old bookshop), so the sales can go hang for me.

It's a sad reflection that I know you can stop a run in a pair of nylons with a drop of clear nail varnish. I used to carry round a bottle on the off-chance that I could come to the rescue of some damsel but it never happened.

scarlet-blue said...

Kev: And soap. Soap can also stop the nylon from running. You will have to help Daphne and me with our new book Kev. Talking of books I love old bookshops too, I used to like reading the personal inscriptions on the inside covers such as: 'To Fluffy, I'm yours forever, Dimkums x...' obviously it was not forever...
Sx

CyberPete said...

It's terribly cold and dark this morning. Don't want to go to work.

Dammit I am halfway there now.

Dave said...

I love old books. Not just second-hand, but really old. I have some 18th-century stuff - lovely leather covers. the insciptions in them are really interesting - and you wonder what happened to the owners...

CyberPete said...

Oh and apparently the trains are using the Saturday schedule today.

Not only are we who work these two days cold, tired schmucks - we are also sad, pathetic, outnumbered by the ones at home in bed sleeping and unimportant.

I am thrilled!

scarlet-blue said...

Pete: It is bloody freezing this morning! Go home! Go back to bed... Is it Monday...?

Dave: Well, exactly... if those books could speak eh?

Sx

Kevin Musgrove said...

If books could speak half of the ones in our libraries would be in deep counselling.