Sunday, 17 May 2009

The Tarot Readings Begin...

This is the first in a series of eagerly awaited Tarot reading posts. Please remember that these readings are for fun and entertainment purposes only and should not be taken at all seriously because I am not psychic and cannot foresee the future. It is also worth noting that your home is at risk if you do not keep up repayments on a mortgage or other loan secured on it.
Okay, so that's all the legal blurb out the way.

Mr XL

PAST:- Are you a redhead Mr XL? Or do you know a redheaded person who has played an important role in your life? In the past you've been a bit of a dreamer, but you've been restless as well... you've been dissatisfied with things. In a nutshell, you've had tons of brilliant ideas but somehow you've never nurtured your potential, which has left you feeling stifled and oppressed.

PRESENT:- Hmmmm... You've been at odds with yourself in the past, but you are now entering a phase of self knowledge and self understanding, which is about to send you on a new journey [possibly to Australia? Who knows...?] And you are about to embrace life in a way that you have been afraid to do in the past. Something has happened recently to make you see things differently.

FUTURE:- Yep.... The cards are telling you to throw caution to the wind, you've been bogged down with responsibilities for far too long. You are going to go on a wild spree where you will be revitalised by a youthful daring. You're going to strip off and streak through the future like a creature possessed. Buy the new car that you've had your eye on for the last five years; go on that holiday...
But be warned - you may have to give up a few things before you can do this. Possibly your clothes... and all of your money...

Now, while Mr XL ponders on these in-depth and life changing revelations, here is a tune for the rest of us... Cos it's Jukebox Monday as well.



***UPDATE*** I have nicked the Tarot Card test from Kate, so now you can take the test for a free personality reading.

34 comments:

B-u-x said...

Oh...I'm the first to comment...does that get me a reading too! I totally accept the terms and (dis)agreements of your shuffling.

Ms B x

BEAST said...

Blimey Miss Scarlet , I am a little worried about the futur penniless and nekkid XL , are you sure you have the cards the right way up this time ???

Gorilla Bananas said...

I would rather have you read the palm of my foot, Miss Scarlet. Can you do it without tickling?

xl said...

Not a redhead myself, but I have a suspicion that Mistress MJ may be a ginger. I hope that counts.

I am giddy with anticipation of my forecast! No clothes, no problem! I'll get through airport security faster ... and it will be easier to pack as well.

You are magic with the cards. Let's go to Las Vegas!

Thanks xXx

savannah said...

HOW EXCITING, SUGAR!!! sounds as if mr xl's fortune is spot on, so i can't wait for my reading!!!! xoxoxo

Eryl Shields said...

Sounds like Mr XL is in for a rather fabulous time! How marvellous that you, cannot possibly yet somehow do, know that, X

tony said...

If I were MR XL I wouldnt know if I were to Twist Or Stick.
Great Toon! Peculiar Clarke Rools!

Crabbers said...

Le passé, c'est la lampe qui éclaire l'avenir. Il y a des gens toujours prêts à souffler dessus pour l'éteindre.
Ma belle sœur est d'un blond vénitien et nous jouons quelque fois au tarot !! :)
Vis ton présent, et laisse ton passé pour l'avenir.


J'adore Pétula !!!

The passed, this is the lamp that lights up the future. There always are ready people to blow over to extinguish it.
My beautiful sister is of a blond Venetian one and we play some time to the tarot!! :)
Lives your present, and leaves your passed for the future.

Wow, that was awkward said...

All I can think of is the streaking scene in Old School. Good thing XL doesn't go by XS!!

mapstew said...

I don't know why, but 'Downtown' always reminds me of 'Greenshield Stamps'!!

Whirlochre said...

Blimey, Scarlet, that's me down to a T.

You may be more of a psychic than you think.

Dave said...

Could you let me have the lottery numbers for next Saturday, please?

Lulu LaBonne said...

You have a gift Scarlet, a true gift...

Scarlet-Blue said...

Bux: I shall add you to the list! And you are quite right - it's all in the wrist action.

Mr Beastie: Hmmm perhaps I shouldn't have used Kev's Happy Family playing cards....?
I'm sure Mr XL will temper this new impulsive streak and will keep some of his clothes.

Mr Bananas: The foot is the window of the soul... as you well know, Mr Bananas.

Mr XL: Mistress MJ is ginger? Oh yes, she had a mishap with a bottle of bleach.
I will have to come to Las Vegas with you to keep you out of trouble!

Savvy: I will try to do more than one reading next time, otherwise we will be here until 2020....!

Eryl: I know! It is most mysterious, and all I did was rub my nose over his avatar...

Tony: I think Mr XL is in the mood for twisting! I don't think he'll go bust really.
I love this Petula toon too.

Crabbers: Je pense que vous pourriez avoir un talent naturel pour le Tarot, M. Crabbers!
I think you could have a natural talent for the Tarot, Mr Crabbers!

Mr Awkward: Streaking used to be so much fun didn't it? People just don't do it anymore. Used to be the best part of a cricket match...

Mr Maps: Greenshield Stamps!!! Well, I think Downtown was released in 1965 so it was probably playing on the radio in the background as your Mum stuck her stamps into her book. The Co-Op had blue stamps, didn't they?

Mr Whirly: Bizarrely it me down to a T as well! Funny that, isn't it?

Dave: The lottery numbers for next week are: 12, 21, 25, 33, 8, 6. I hope this helps.

Lulu: I know, I am blessed... I have true vision..

Sx

Scarlet-Blue said...

Sp. *it's*... Apologies for spelling... I'm gagging for a cup of tea.
Sx

Dave said...

You're welcome to come and streak at any of my cricket matches.

If these numbers don't come up, you'll owe me a pound. If they do, I'll send you two pounds.

BEAST said...

The foot is the window to the soul That explains the verrucca then :-)

KAZ said...

I am stunned and amazed.
How could you possibly have the foresight to predict that XL will be going to Australia?

having my cake said...

No Tarot readings for me please Miss Scarlet. I like life to be a surprise :) I love Pet Clarke singing that song... but I cant get my damned speakers to work today! Hopefully I shall get a chance to return later :)

Scarlet-Blue said...

Dave: Oh wouldn't it be funny if those numbers came up?!
I'd do a streak for my share!!!

Mr Beastie: My soul needs a good scrub, I can tell you.

Kaz: I know! I have incredible insight!

Ms Cakes: I'm sure your reading would be a good one. But to be honest I don't really like mine being done either.

Sx

Clyde said...

Ah, get your fortune told while your moon is in Uranus
And that is all in the wrist action

MJ said...

Will XL still be fluffing my pillows?

Emerson Marks said...

Give up your possesions, XL. Burn your money. Do you remember when Bill Drummond of the KLF burned a million pounds? I think he had a nervous breakdown.

Dave said...

If I win £10, you're welcome to come and streak for a share.

Scarlet-Blue said...

Mr Clyde: I read in the cards that you like cup-cakes. Preferably two at a time...

MJ: Yes, but he's going to insist on doing it nekkid.

Mr Marks: Just imagine the sort of buzz you'd get from being able to burn a million pounds...
I reckon it was a stunt.

Dave: For a fiver I might take a glove off.

Sx

Kate Lord Brown said...

Scarlet you have a gift - I see a bright future ...

MJ said...

Did someone mention cake?

Scarlet-Blue said...

Kate: I thought so too... until I didn't have the vision NOT to click on MJ's link...

MJ: WHY, WHY, WHY.... would anyone want to do that to a helpless cake???????
P.S Clyde has cake going on at his place... they are also being cruel to cakes.

Sx

mutleythedog said...

I read tea bags, the pyramid shaped ones are best...

HoodChick said...

I can't believe you fell for the cake link.

If I wasn't known for my lack of time in stiff competition with my laziness I would run out and buy a lotto ticket.

Dave said...

A naked wrist can be very exciting.

BEAST said...

You dont get this sort of cake farting behaviour at the WI Miss Scarlet !

Scarlet-Blue said...

Mr Mutts: I know! I thought I was the only person who knew this?

Hoodchicky: I've been avoiding that link for a long time now... but curiosity finally got the better of me. Go buy the ticket!

Dave: Actually my wrists are quite firm.

Mr Beastie: Indeed you don't, thank goodness! They do interesting things with merengues though.

Sx

Kevin Musgrove said...

What have I walked into late? Petula Clark singing "Downtown" (ta me duck!); cake farts; and nobody doing the "you will meet a short, squat man in a muslin bag" joke. Deary me.