Sunday, 26 July 2009

8 out of 10

I have a visitor. He stays overnight; I give him fish fingers or a nibble on my chicken fillets, but then he buggers off after breakfast. I am a muppet, and shouldn't allow myself to be used in this cruel, thoughtless, heartless way. Sometimes I don't see him for days. I deserve better, but as soon as I've forgotten about him he turns up again, looking dishevelled, slightly the worse for wear, and in need of tender loving care. It will all end in tears...




The funny thing was that he turned up about a week after I had to have my sweet old cat put down. So how did this stray ginger tom know that there were cans of Whiskas going begging? Cats are smart aren't they?

50 comments:

xl said...

He's a hansom guy. Is there a pet name for him?

Scarlet-Blue said...

Mr XL: I'm finding it difficult to give him a pet name, because then I'll start calling him and I'll look desperate and clingy... and that's such a turn off... you know what cats are like...
Sx

PI said...

You did say you weren't ginger too didn't you?

Eryl Shields said...

Toms always know these things, they are arch exploiters of women with whiskers, beware! X

Elizabeth Bradley said...

A big orange tabby cat adopted me many moons ago. I came to love him but I never really owned him. I called him Riley.

TechnoBabe said...

You could call the lovely cat Mimosa.

mapstew said...

An Angel Cat!

Ponita in Real Life said...

Good on you for keeping the old tom fed and loved up, Scarlet!

I once had a ginger cat - named Silas - he lived to be 18 1/2 and was my most favourite of all my cats over the years. Handsome and sweet natured. Still miss the old boy. :-)

icancarryallthebagsandthebabiestoo said...

aww... I am with you.

I'm a sucker for handome man with charm.

xoxo

Anna

MJ said...

Ginger toms are my favourites!

Right this moment I am laundering the cat bed that my cat barfed on.

It's a charmed life.

Dave said...

If I turn up, looking slightly the worse for wear, and in need of tender loving care, will you let me have a nibble on your fillets?

Jimmy Bastard said...

That's the thing about women, all males are attracted to that hauntingly elusive odour of salmon that can never be found.

I like your floor by the way Scarls.

Gadjo Dilo said...

Cats are indeed smart, Scarley; mmm, I feel a post coming on.

And a "stray ginger tom", eh? Birds of a feather, you know...

CyberPete said...

Allowing yourself to be used like that - and by a ginger?

The shame.

Chairman Bill said...

Ever noticed how ginger nuts have a penchant for purple?

eroswings said...

I totally get you! It's like we're thinking the same thing! I have been having a very similar experience! That's so nice of you to take care of the cat. And he has actually taken to coming into your house! Wow!

KAZ said...

Love the advert.
Cats have the right to treat humans as slaves.
No use fighting it.

Rog said...

I could post you Oz for 24 hours. He would clear the place of insurgents.

Lulu LaBonne said...

Is he spraying his territory, that's the bit I'm not keen on - that and the vomit obviously - I'm not that keen on finding turds where I've just planted seeds in the garden either.

That's what I don't like about men - now cats...

Scarlet-Blue said...

Pat: I AM NOT GINGER!!! The cat is.

Eryl: He does seem to like sheltering in my overgrown bush.

Elizabeth: I reckon my Tom has a four course meal every night.. I don't think I'm the only one who's fallen for his charms.

Technobabe: Or Bucks Fizz?

Mr Maps: Quite possibly!

Ponita: I am a cat mug! Always have been. My favourite cat was called Harvey, he fancied himself as a hair stylist and would sleep on my head. Still miss him.

Ms Ican: My goodness! What a long name you have! Hello and welcome!
I too am a sucker.

MJ: Hmmm... you keep anything nice with a cat around. I too have been a pet laundering service.

Dave: Well, there's a question...

Mr Jimmy: I do a good line in salmon fish fingers.
Ancient stripped pine... with added woodworm!

Gadj: Enough with the ginger! Though this cat wears it well.

Pete: He's a lot better looking than Mick Hucknell!

Mr Chairman: I wouldn't know, I'm not ginger, and I like red and blue.

Mr Swings: He comes in at night - it's like he's scared of the dark!

Kaz: I'm actually feeding this cat Sheba, chicken skin and salmon... no wonder he likes me!

Rog: Well that's the thing - I actually consider myself to be more of a dog person... maybe I'm a bit of both.

Lulu: Yep - cats have much better manners!

Sx

xl said...

I wasn't going to leave another comment, but the verification word was "poussy!"

Scarlet-Blue said...

Mr XL: Damn cheeky Word Verification!
Sx

savannah said...

i love reading about other people's cats! i'm on a strict regime: no dogs, no cats, no fish, no birds...and i'm barely tolerating the live plants... xoxox

PI said...

Just teasin' darlin'

Sarah said...

Just as you begin to think you can't live without him, he will leave you scarlet...be warned!

Dave, really!

Ginro said...

He does seem to like sheltering in my overgrown bush.

Time to get out those rusty garden shears again I guess. Unless that is you don't plan on wandering around in your bikini this year.

BEAST said...

Ooooh a ginger pussy
***sniggers***

Scarlet-Blue said...

Savvy: I know... I'm creating a rod for my own back!

Pat: ;O)

Sarah: I know... I wear my heart on my sleeve.

Ginro: Nice avatar!
Summer is officially over... I'm back in my thermal long-johns.

Mr Beastie: I can assure you that that isn't ginger!

Sx

Liam said...

That Cat sounds like some of the guys my girlfriends friends complain about.

Madame DeFarge said...

Ahem, as a red-haired person, I would like to briefly speak up for the gingers of this world. There, that was it.

rhinestonecatboy said...

A fair point Madame De Farge. Red hair can be a very attractive feature on a young lady.

Jessica, my lady companion, is partial to a ginger gentleman and England's middle order batsman Paul Colingwood is her ginger of choice at the moment

Scotland is a a bit of sanctuary for our flame haired brethren. re non-ginger kids in Scotland teased at school?

mago said...

Goddam basteds continue to abuse me ... don't feed them, they bring their prey to me, purr and turn around, mocking ...

jekandhyd said...

Couldn't help but notice that in the photo the cat seems to be inside the house and you seem to have been forced to take the pic outside the door. It's probably already too late, as I guess you have now been evicted, but I would have thought that baliffs using cats could be considered "dirty tricks". You might have a case yet Scarlet, don't give up all hope. I'm sending a box of tissues and the name of a dodgy practice lawyer in the post. He's ginger as well so you should get on.

Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

Think yourself lucky, I was adopted by a stray Scottie. My biggest mistake was to feed him the first time, now he's learned to open the fridge and even how to work the computer. He spends far too much time in his basket. Every time I throw him out he comes back in the window like that one in the Flintstones. Sigh.

Michelle said...

Oh he is a handsome boy...watch out, he looks like a heartbreaker.

Leah said...

That is very very sweet. I'm hoping a dog will just sort of wander over to our house and stay...I wouldn't mind a cat either though.

CyberPete said...

That's the bloke from Simply Red?

He is one ugly.. Like Carrot Top.

Dave said...

Why is it that girls think that the rest of the world is interested in stories about their pussies, but when a bloke mentions cricket they start yawning?

Scarlet-Blue said...

Liam: Hmmm... they always turn up when they're hungry.

Master Catboy and Madame D: Nicole Kidman is the ambassador for ginger. She's done alright for herself. But she isn't Scottish.

Mr Mags: They are bringing you presents! Or they want you to cook it and serve it up later?

Mr Jekand: I think I will need the name of the lawyer. I am now living in a recently aquired pop-up tent from Outdoor World, whilst the cat is slumming it up on my sofa.

Daphne: I think you should force Mr Scots onto the street to earn a few bob from portrait busking.

Michelle: I think you might be right... all cats are heartbreakers.

Leah: Same here! I miss my dog something rotten. I will get another one one day - that'll upset the cat!

Pete: Weirdly, he was considered something of a love machine - not I don't know why either.

Dave: Well, which would you rather have?!

Sx

xl said...

"Pssst... if you email me I can give you the competition answers [for a small fee]"


:)

Scarlet-Blue said...

Mr XL: I think I will... I swear no 3 is Mick Hucknell... but he's not American.
I've only got two so far!
Sx

Dave said...

I think, on the whole, cricket, thank you.

ps. Invitation for you to guest-write is now in my comment column.

Kerrie said...

Oh what a cutie. I would call him Charlie after the public information films.."Charlie says don't talk to strangers".
However nibbling on their chicken fillets is obviously fine.

Kevin Musgrove said...

Dave - you don't need to rub the ladies down with linseed oil for the winter.

Mind you... having said that...

Emerson Marks said...

I thought you were a ginge?

Ginro said...

I got four of the names so far Scarlet, but have given up with the rest. If you want them I'll send them to you.

Crabbers said...

Waou !! Finalement le chat montre le bout de son nez !

Les chiens ont des maîtres , les chats des serviteurs...

On a remarqué que de tous les animaux, les femmes, les mouches et les chats sont ceux qui passent le plus de temps à leur toilette.

Scarlet-Blue said...

Dave: I shall try to think of a 'Dave' post!

Kerrie: Yes, it's a peculiar code of conduct!
My first cat was called Charlie.

Kev: Don't give Dave ideas! He has enough of those as it is.

Mr Marks: No this is an ugly rumour started by Mrs P... who appears to have gone AWOL. Yes, Mrs P, if you're out there, I have noticed.

Crabbers: Wow! Finally the cat shows the tip of his nose!

Dogs have masters, cats servants ...

It was noted that of all animals, women, flies and cats are those who spend more time at their toilet


I'm not sure about the flies!
Now then M.Crabbers, I have a hunch that you are probably much better at English than I am at French. I saw you writing the Queen's English over at Pat's the other day. You are a cheeky pomme frite!

Je ne suis pas sûr pour les mouches!
Alors M. crabiers, j'ai le pressentiment que vous êtes probablement beaucoup mieux l'anglais que je suis à la française. Je vous ai vu écrit de la Reine de l'anglais au Pat's, l'autre jour. Vous êtes un insolent pomme frite!

Sx

Ginro said...

Turns out that I'd had five correct names after all, not four as I had thought. I don't know *sigh* you might have won that competition Scarlet, lol. I can see it now, headlines blazoned all across the Internet screaming 'Miss Scarlet wins competition on Infomaniac!'
But people never listen to me until it's too late *sigh*.

JeffScape said...

Cats are evil! No clue why I have two... I'm a slave, I suppose.