Friday, 9 July 2010

Groovy Boobs and Posts

Since being on a blogging break I have blogged more than usual. Which is a bit odd. Anyhow, I thought I ought to put a new post up because my previous post wasn't really a proper post... only I haven't really got anything to post about... but I shall try to post something anyway. Maybe I will write a post about posts [see, nothing to say at all]?
Enough of this silliness. Over the last few days I have been concerned about my bra size; I'm not really sure what size I should be wearing. According to measuring guides, I should be wearing a 34D. This can't be right as I have no spillage from my 32B, it's not too tight and it doesn't ride up at the back. I wondered if their were any ladies out there who could advise, or any gentlemen willing to assist...?

84 comments:

Scarlet Blue said...

Ah. I've had a bit of a feel round and I think I should try a 32C.
Sx

tony said...

I Bet Your Glad To Get That Off your Chest.......

Dave said...

I absolutely refuse to fall into the trap of offering to lend a hand, have a feel round for you, or any other suggestive remarks.

xl said...

I stand ready to assist in any measurements! Your "appearance, comfort, and safety" are a concern to us all!

Ponita in Real Life said...

Scarlet, you will probably find that what size you wear all depends on the style of bra... seems there is no standardized sizing. XL is always so helpful, isn't he? Just take a few sample sizes into the change room with you and pop out to show us how they fit. I myself am a 38DDD, which is a very difficult size to find. So when I do and I like the fit, I always buy several. If you find one that fits like a second skin and is very comfy, buy every colour they have!

MJ said...

Put yourself in the hands of a specialist.

And by specialist, I don't mean XL.

Mistress MJ shops at a bra boutique where they specialize in selling high quality bras and have trained, experienced staff on hand to assist you.

In other words, don't ask for advice at a Primark or wherever it is that Brits shop for cheap clothing.

Sure, you'll have to pay more but the comfort and style of your girls is worth it.

Mark said...

I've just measured my wife and she appears to need a 15 1/2 inch bra. I'm not sure whether I used the correct approach, but I found that my bowler hat fits one perfectly and that's a size 7 3/4

KAZ said...

Yes - but how does she get that bouncy hairstyle?

Lulu LaBonne said...

Have you tried coconut shells? You'll find you're always ready to party in such an outfit - and so hard-wearing xxx

Pat said...

I was measured recently and told I needed a smaller size but a bigger cup. I have a theory that they do this so you will change all your existing bras and buy their stock.

kyknoord said...

So your cup runneth over?

Rog said...

The 32B used to run from the depot to Westcourt Estate. You'd wait for ages and two would come along together at the same time.

Scarlet Blue said...

I knew this was going to elicit some interesting, thoughtful, profound and well considered opinions. I will reply to MJ first before she vanishes...

MJ said Put yourself in the hands of a specialist.

And by specialist, I don't mean XL.

Mistress MJ shops at a bra boutique where they specialize in selling high quality bras and have trained, experienced staff on hand to assist you.

In other words, don't ask for advice at a Primark or wherever it is that Brits shop for cheap clothing.

Sure, you'll have to pay more but the comfort and style of your girls is worth it.


Primark!!!!! PRIMARK!!!!! I may wear flip flops but I draw the line at Primark.... but I will take your advice and visit a specialist.

Tony: I only hope that in freeing my chest that I didn't make a tit of myself.

Dave: I'm surprised at your reluctance... you are usually all fingers and thumbs.

Mr XL: Thank you Mr XL; you are an expert in fluffy pillows. I'm sure you will be an extra asset.

Ponita: Blimey!! 38DDD!!! Can you see your feet?
You are right though, and I've taken a fancy to gel packed Ultimo bras... with women like you around I need all the extra padding I can get.

Mark: Are you the Mark I know and love... or a different new Mark? Either way, probably best that you don't buy your wife any lingerie unless she is on hand to advise.

Kaz: Good to see you! And I don't mind sharing my Battenburg with you.
Bouncy hair is easy when using a trampoline.

Lulu: I've always fancied going to a fancy dress party as a Hula girl wearing a coconut bra and a grass skirt. How did you know?

Pat: It does make you wonder doesn't it? And as Ponita suggests, sizing differs from brand to brand. 32B at M&S are huge on me, whilst Ultimo seems to fit almost perfectly.

Mr Kinky: This depends on what position I'm in.

Rog: Were they double deckers though?

Sx

Dave said...

Theres a photo of a 38B on my blog today.

Scarlet Blue said...

Dave: You should C the B's that I've got!
Sx

Dave said...

Send photos in plain brown envelope. Or shall we have our blog-meet after all?

Scarlet Blue said...

Dave: I have done my bum so I may as well do my boobs.
Sx

Dave said...

*falls off chair in excitement*

eroswings said...

Good luck shopping for new undergear!

I can never tell sizes well. I use round fruits to describe the sizes--from oranges to melons.

Mr VeryVeryBored said...

...but then you have the whole citrus fruit "is it a clementine or satsuma" issue. The more imprecise yet simpler scale - "handful" or "more than a handful" - can often bear more, er, fruit.

Or a slap.

Eryl Shields said...

Have you considered duct tape, it's the only thing that works for me? X

BEAST said...

***wiring two buckets together***

Kevin Musgrove said...

All this would be solved if the straps and whalebones had a ratchet arrangement so that the bra could be tightened up once the lady has put it on. It could be done by a simple arrangement of levers and asymmetrical cogs on one of the shoulders.

There's an engineering solution for every problem.

Chairman Bill said...

Not having moobs, I couldn't comment. All I can do is lend a hand, and another hand.

Chairman Bill said...

Brrrrrrrrrrrr

nick said...

Well, if they're not being squeezed and crushed mercilessly, and if they're not bouncing around in over-spacious receptacles, then your present size is probably okay. Like Pat, I suspect a secret ruse to sell millions of unnecessary new bras.

moreidlethoughts said...

Yes, I thought someone would do the bowler hats joke.And the #38 bus.
A word of caution if you do go for coconut shells - pad the rim. (Or stand still.)

Princess said...

Dear Miss Scarlet,
Might i suggest a selection of These

Princess said...

Sorry Try This

The Unbearable Banishment said...

I enjoy a little more than a handful. Is that the type of information you were soliciting?

Expect lots and lots of hits from people conducting searches for bra fetish sites.

moreidlethoughts said...

I have a couple of options for you here
http://moreidlethoughts.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/nudity-underwear-and-artistic-licence-2/

LL Cool Joe said...

This is an area I know nothing about. What bra's come in different sizes?

Ponita in Real Life said...

Scarlet: I have to bend forward a bit to view my paws.... but given that I am 5'9", they are not horribly oversized for my frame. I do have wide shoulders to accommodate these girls. ;-)

MJ's advice is very sound, despite the higher price tag at specialty shops. My youngest sister is, I believe, a 36G... and she is 3" shorter than me!

Scarlet Blue said...

Dave: Should I provide tissues?

Mr Swings: If Mr Beastie is a banana then you are probably a marrow. I'm liking your system.

Mr Very: Hello and Welcome!!
I like the fruit system...
How big are your hands?

Eryl: I have actually thought about the sellotape method... but I was worried about ripping it off.

Mr Beastie: It'll make a change from playing with your fruit bowls.

Kev: Your comment is a ruse for me to mention CORSETS. There I've said it.

Mr Chairman: x2. They are not jellies, Mr Chairman!

Nick: Sometimes they feel a bit squashed. I suppose I have the option of taking the socks out.

Dinah: Indeed! I don't want any accidents with my coconuts.

Sx

Scarlet Blue said...

Missy Princess: I've always fancied a pair of pasties! I think I could work them and they would turn heads in Waitrose. Literally.

Mr Banish: I already have lots of hits from people interested in Smeg... the quality of hits can only go up!

Dinah: I want the cockle bra!!!

Mr Joe: I think I'm going to have to take you under my wing....

Ponita: I think my problem is narrow shoulders - hence why I often say 'chin up, tits out' - If I slouch then my straps are more prone to falling down.
I'm probably a 33B1/2!!! I should really go to a specialist and find out for sure.

Sx

Dave said...

If clothing is going to fall off, then feel free to slouch as much as you like.

Scarlet Blue said...

Dave: I am now wearing my sports bra as I am practising my skating moves. Everything is nicely strapped in.
Sx

Kerrie said...

I dream of 34D. Like you 32B is me, you can borrow my zebra print bra if you like and my christmas one with the fluff. We can do a bra exchange!
I do have a bit of a four boob problem since I put on a bit of weight, but so far I am managing to ignore this and pretend the spillage is just in my imagination.

TechnoBabe said...

You set yourself up for plenty of help from the men, so funny. I like bras and lots of pretty ones.

Scarlet Blue said...

Kerrie: Have you read the measuring guide? I've measured myself in the mirror so that I know that I'm measuring the right bits - anyhow, I was doing it all wrong before and now it's a toss up between being a 30D or a 32C. I think you should also try the 32C if you are having spillage... and try the Ultimo bra with gel packs... they're the best uplift bras I've ever worn.

Techybabes: I'm seriously getting into lingerie - it makes you feel good on the inside even if you're wearing your scruffiest clothes on the outside. Good lingerie is a real treat. I'm sure all the men would agree!

Sx

Ponita in Real Life said...

No padding of any kind for me. If I did, I'd have a built-in chin rest!

Have to agree with the nice lingerie under even your scruffiest clothes. Makes you feel like a million bucks and adds to that sex appeal. ;-)

xl said...

My ruler is at the ready, Miss Scarlet!

Whirlochre said...

Bravissimo seem to know about measuring boobs.

Alternatively, there are boa feathers — and tall dwarves adept at walking half an inch ahead of you.

dangerouswriter said...

I think it's a good idea to do as MJ says, though there are so many helpful gentlemen around, Scarlet.

I guess I must be 32AA -as per the measuring guide- but I don't worry too much about it at the topfree beach where i spend my holidays. :)

Have a nice bra shopping day!

Leni

Kevin Musgrove said...

Corsets. Quite so. Mind you, it can be like hugging an accordion.

mapstew said...

Bras, Bras, Bras!
Married, with three daughters!
Bras, Bras, Bras!
And knickers! :¬)

xxx(L)

Scarlet Blue said...

Ponita: You are quite Amazonian aren't you?

Mr XL: But are your hands warm?

Mr Whirly: I was going to ask Ponita about Bravissimo!
Anyhow... for some reason your comment has brought back memories of the 'Singing Ringing Tree'... so we'll leave it there.

Leni: I've never done topless on a beach! I have very fair skin...

Kev: You sound like you have experience of hugging women in corsets...?

Mr Maps: Are you ever allowed in the bathroom??!

Sx

Dave said...

You have sports underwear? Have you thought of joining our cricket team?

Scarlet Blue said...

Dave: AAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!
Sx

Dave said...

I'll take that as a low moan of almost sexual satisfaction.

Scarlet Blue said...

Dave: You are a confused soul then!
Sx

moreidlethoughts said...

Sorry, Scarlet, but the cockle bra went for $300 at the auction.

Mr VeryVeryBored said...

Its a fair shout Scarlet - I hadn't factored in the Pat Jennings / Paul Daniels variable there. It is almost as it we need a system that can measure the size of bosom and width of back. Hmmm... give me a few days...

CyberPete said...

If I were you I'd go to a proper lingerie boutique and get measured and they can guide you.

I need to get the perfect underwear. Something holding, lifting and shaping.

63mago said...

You still feel the boob groove?

Kerrie said...

I will look at the measuring guide as suggested....I think a C may be the answer.
Also my friend T, told me a reliable way to check to see if you have middle aged droopage. Apparently if you look in the mirror your nipples should be exactly half way between your shoulder and your elbow. If they are lower then I am afraid your titties are going south. If they are higher then you are a lucky perky freak of nature.

Leah said...

Favorite ever post comment thread.

There's supposedly a very special place in Brooklyn where resides the world's greatest bra savant, an old old lady who literally squeezes your boobs, then magically whisks out the perfect bra.

the eternal worrier: said...

‘Trickalastic!’ Sounds interesting but the trick I always wanted was the one were Joey from Friends could undo a bra by clicking his fingers. Sorry slightly off topic... but I am a bloke and you’re talking about lingerie.

A popular topic I see (58 comments!)

Clyde said...

Maybe I could walk behind you and take the situation in hand

Does it depend on the warmer weather ---do things get bigger---hmmm

mapstew said...

I have my own bucket and basin out back! :¬)

xxx

Heff said...

Sounds like a golden opportunity for false advertising to me.

Roadshow said...

In all honesty poppet, at our age you are just kidding yourself wearing a bra. A shopping trolley or a good strong carrier bag provides a more comfortable solution.

Madame DeFarge said...

I need two small boys to uphold my honour in this department. Mere material is insufficient to maintain the fight against gravity.

Kevin Musgrove said...

I did once hug a piano accordion

Scarlet Blue said...

Dinah: I will just have to go beach combing and make one of my own... I will be wary of crabs though.

Mr Very: I am quivering with expectation - nothing new there then.

Pete: Do they do Spanx for men?

Mr Mags: I am having a good boob day - today I am strapless and my bra is so good that everything is still uplifted and in one place. Nothing worse than floppy cups.

Kerrie: Indeed, I am definitely a freak of nature!
[I will do this test properly before I go to bed - I have a bra on at the moment and my nipples are slung over my shoulders].

Leah: I would like to go to Brooklyn - I love the accent I hear on the telly - so this gives me more reason.
Gok Wan has a similar method.

Mr Eternal: I'd like to meet a man who can do this... they usually get in a fumble and then the moment is lost.

Mr Clyde: The time of the month has an effect on size... and so does eating chocolate for some strange reason.

Mr Maps: You poor thing! Sounds like you should start building an extension... and get a nice wet room all to yourself.

Mr Heff: I read a horrible story in a magazine about exploding implants yesterday, so the more women who get enhancement from their bras the better... a lot can be done with a good bra. I see it as my duty to spread the word.
Have you been fooled by a good bra, Mr Heff?

Mr Roadshow: AT OUR AGE???? AT OUR AGE????!!! I'll have you know that I've been 39 for a good few years and will be for the forseeable future.
Actually you can make a jolly good bra from a strong carrier bag - a few twists and a couple of knots - it's almost a fashion statement.

Madame D: Be very careful with the two small boys... some people, with dubious minds, might get hold of the wrong end of the stick.
But you sound blessed.

Kev: I think you've had enough practise, it's about time you moved on to the real thing.

Sx

nick said...

Never mind the chest furniture, did you realise Andy Pandy is now 60 years old?

At our age indeed. Having just turned 39 myself, I can proudly say I'm still 38AAA with no need for a man bra or any discreet uplift.

Scarlet Blue said...

Nick: Andy Pandy and Lubby Loo....
Lubby Loo... now that conjures an image...
No moobs for you then, Nick?!
...or was it Loopy Loo?
Sx

wendy house said...

Sloggi
something firm and well sprun with a good curve. You'll know it when you put it on.
Try the local family store in either Tiverton, Taunton, Totnes or any town begining with T

63mago said...

Good to hear that all is strapless uplifting and un-floppy. But I hope you lubed each boob with sun milk?

Ponita in Real Life said...

Scarlet, I may seem Amazonian to you, but in my family, I am one of the smaller people! Only two sisters shorter...

I have been blessed with semi-perky boobs... my nipples are only slightly lower than halfway between my shoulder and elbow... and I'm more than half a century old!

Tell XL he needs a tape measure... a ruler isn't nearly bendy enough. And I'll bet his hands are warm. He lives in Texas, after all... land of perpetual summer.

I once dated a guy who was very adept at undoing a bra quickly with just one hand... ;-)

Gadjo Dilo said...

Is that Nicholas Parsons doing the voice over for that advert?? Certainly sounds like him. And I'd definitely buy a bra from Nicholas Parsons, so it would be a smart decision by Maidenform.

Scarlet Blue said...

Wendy: I used to wear Sloggi! They were bra tops rather than bras. They have a fancy dress shop in Thornbury...?

Mr Mags: There is something strangely erotic about your comment....?

Ponita: I reckon I'd only come up to your knees!
You don't see many front loading bras these days... I think they were designed more for men than women.

Gadj:!!!!! Haven't seen you in ages!!
Ah, bless 'im - Nicholas Parsons... Time for a Sale of the Century Youtube?

Sx

xl said...

@ Ponita's "38DDD ... semi-perky boobs."

Canada is known for its abundant natural resources!

Scarlet Blue said...

...is this conversation going to veer into beaver territory?
Sx

Julia said...

The worst thing about over-shoulder-boulder-holders is when the wire pings free and nearly takes your eye out.

63mago said...

"Front loading bras"?
Help, please? Are there "back loaders" too?

Kevin Musgrove said...

I agree with Gadjo: I'd buy a bra off Nicholas Parsons.

He once did a very good job of passing me a plate of sausage rolls (he was closest to the buffet table at the after-show party).

Scarlet Blue said...

Julia: Yes, I have had an unfortunate stabbing incident involving a loose underwire. I still have the scars. I advise plenty of padding at all times which gives uplift and protection.

Mr Mags: Frontloaders are bras that do up in the front instead of the back - giving easy access.

Kev: Were you a contestant on Sale of the Century?

Sx

BEAST said...

I am now completely confused about size , cups and gel inserts.......or why I have to buy a bra from Nicolas Parsons
***stomps off***

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Beastie: Just go and buy some melons from Nicholas Parsons, then all will be well.
Sx

Mitzi said...

Nicholas Parson has a very nipnotising voice. Don't despair over the size of your mammies. With the aid of a Maidenform bra and a clean pair of your old mans socks, hey presto! Eat your heart out Lolo Ferrari

63mago said...

CARAMBA - MITZI!

What about a new post, Ms. Scarlet? And you promised pictures to Dave ... to cite you:

"I have done my bum so I may as well do my boobs.
Sx "

Your audience is a-waiting.

*hands sun milk*

nick said...

Boobs as well as bum? Come now, 63, a gal is entitled to a bit of feminine modesty....

Scarlet Blue said...

Mitzi: I have cunningly deployed two scarves and three pairs of socks into my bra to fill the void. I now have a convincing chestage.

Mr Mags: I have drawn you a pic and I can assure you that it is a good representation.

Nick: Indeed I am!!

Sx