Sunday, 2 January 2011

A Proper New Year Post

.
I spent New Year's Eve up Mr Beastie's back passage, it was be-crammed with fellow revellers and smelt only slightly of banana puree. I think it had been cleaned for the occasion.
The back passage is of course attached to the delightful Cafe C. To be honest I don't really remember an awful lot about it. I have some strange abstract photos on my ancient Nokia, such as this:


...and this may be upside down... who's to know?
I met the gorgeous Mavis/Frobisher... who seemed amazed at the remarkable resemblance I bear to my avatar... and I met the charming Mr C [he is wonderful, how he puts up with Mr Beastie's nonsense, I do not know] and the lovely James, who both looked after me for the evening and made me feel like a minor celebrity. I had tried to sneak in incognito by wearing my over sized gabardine mac and Jackie O sunglasses, but I think my large entourage might have given me away. Anyhow, the champagne was soon flowing... interspersed with rounds of shots that I now find very difficult to describe - I have a vague recollection of something creamy in a very small plastic cup. Quite frankly, I have no idea what went down my throat that night, whatever it was it was it must have worked because I have only just sobered up.
I do have a blurry recollection of a belly dancer trying to lure me on to the dance floor... and I heard Mavis singing.... but it is all a bit of a haze... and I don't actually remember midnight.... I possibly sampled Mr Beastie's nibbles.... who's to know? As Mr Beastie himself quite rightly puts it: Loose Lips Sink Ships.

To all at Cafe C - a very big thank you for spoiling me something rotten and for giving me a wonderful New Year's Eve [I just wish I could remember more about it!] And....

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

...to everyone who has stumbled and stumbles across me.


NB. Plans for the recovery of the Freaking Green Elf Shorts will soon be underway... more news to follow...  

59 comments:

63mago said...

YAY First!

63mago said...

I think your Nokia was wearing glasses too! I am looking forward to more stumbling this year, Sweetie!

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Mags: Happy New Year!!! I think I might have to go back to bed now...!
Sx

Ponita in Real Life said...

Ah, Scarlet, you party girl, you! Sounds like you had a wonderful New Year's Eve partying at Cafe C. Did Beast not wear the FGES for the occasion?

Scarlet Blue said...

Ponita: Alas, the FGES are still in Canada.... but as you can tell, I am tracking them... I WOZ ROBBED... but I now have Mr Coppens on speed dial and he realises his mistake.
Sx

nick said...

You sampled Mr Beastie's nipples? Disgusting.

I was only marginally tipsy chez nous on New Year's Eve. I was aware enough to watch Jools Holland wheeling in all the golden oldies who really should be tucked up in their retirement homes.

I think Rumer is the one to watch.

Scarlet Blue said...

Nick: NIBBLES!!! Mr Beastie is famed for his tropical delights.
Every once in a while you have to get out and party. Next year I might rescue you from Jools Holland.
Sxx

Princess said...

What an exciting adventure Miss Scarlet.
did you perchance savour the delights of Mr Beasties "kipper surprise"?
you did see in the New Year in marvelous company...

Scarlet Blue said...

Princess: I have plans to go back to sample Ma Beastie's infamous chickpea curry... and of course I have to finalise my strategy for the safe removal of the FGES....
Sx

MJ said...

Happy New Year, Miss Scarlet!

What a way to ring it in!

I spent New Year's Eve up Mr Beastie's back passage

I’ve heard it’s quite spacious!

Are those UFOs hovering up on the ceiling?

I think my large entourage might have given me away

I’ve told you that gabardine makes your entourage look fat!

p.s. Do I dare put a link here to the photo of Beast’s fruit basket so that others may understand about the banana puree? I am concerned that it may shock your readers.

Lulu LaBonne said...

Happy New Year to you sweetie, sounds like you celebrated in style - and with vitamin C how healthy and sensible! xxxx

Scarlet Blue said...

MJ: I think a link with a warning would be more than suitable... we don't want to frighten Dave... erm... where is Dave?
My entourage is now undergoing a firm massage. I'm sure I could make do with a little less!!
SXXX

Scarlet Blue said...

Lulu: I think I will be on the orange juice for the rest of the month... I have only just twigged that it's 2011...
SXXX

MJ said...

ATTENTION EVERYONE: The following link is NSFW (not safe for work) AND it’s also NSFD (not safe for Dave).

If you’re wondering why Miss Scarlet said that Beast’s back passage smelt only slightly of banana puree, I can shed some light on this.

Click here for a photo of Beast’s “fruit basket.”

We have tried to discourage such behavior with Beast but he insists on carrying on.

There is really no reasoning with him.

Scarlet Blue said...

MJ: Thank you! This is another good reason why the FGES need to be rescued from Mr Beastie's lair... they will only end up reeking of banana puree and other noxious substances. They need to be saved!!!
Sx

xl said...

I have no idea about such fast-paced night-life!

I do, however, stand ready to assist Miss Scarlet to the best of my ability in obtaining the FGES!

wv: luteneu (a sign?)

xl said...

[forgot to tic the e-mail box. sorry]

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr XL: First we have to fly you back to Blighty and then put your pillow fluffing experience to good use...
Sxxxx

Eryl said...

Gosh you did have an exciting time! Happy New Year, Missy, XXX

savannah said...

cheers, sugar! sounds as if you had the night of all nights! happy new year!xoxoxoxo

Roses said...

Sounds like you had a fantastic time honey.

Hopefully 2011 will be the year when you kidnap the FGES.

Start as you mean to go on.

Dave said...

Sorry I'm late. I've been flinging compliments in the direction of a young lady. Preceeded by M&S Belgian chocolate biscuits.

Now then, where were we? Ah, I see I'm not supposed to look.

Mitzi said...

Mmmm banana puree rich in vitamin S!

Happy New Year Scarlet.

Wow, that was awkward said...

Happy New Year Scarlet! You pay to play...

fairyhedgehog said...

Happy New Year!

It sounds like you had a great time, if only you could remember it.

Macy said...

Happy New Year Scarlett! And don't worry, I've had a look at the photo on Beatie's page, and your entrouage doesn'tlook big at all...

Happy Frog and I said...

Sounds like you had a fantastic time, I am so glad. Happy New Year! :-)

FirstNations said...

JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS !!!!!!

Was it wonderful? It sounds like it was! I would give six dollars and FIFTY TWO CENTS to be you right now! Really!!

MJ said...

I up the ante with six dollars and SEVENTY TWO cents!

MJ said...

p.s. Miss Scarlet, I've just posted a photo of you and Beast together on my blog.

wendy house said...

will the improper New Year Eve post be following the proper one, or doing something censorable to the proper post, or something.
I investigated Happy Frog's Kitchen looking for Jonah Louis, but I think he was misleading us when he said we could always find him in the kitchen at parties, or his camofluage is extremely effective.
Happy New Year x

kyknoord said...

Wishing you a year filled with bananas and elephants!

K said...

The creamy white stuff is usually Baileys, it's the nibbles you gotta watch.

Nota Bene said...

Had the camera been drinking too??

BEAST said...

Dammit my earlier comment vapourised . I was ruminating as to wether the red bible I found under your table had dropped out its hiding place in your undergarments during a frenzied fit of dancing Miss Scarlet ???

Scarlet Blue said...

Eryl: Yes, I did have a bit of an adventure... and I'm still not fully recovered.

Savvy: I did indeed! I'm still not quite sure what day it is.

Roses: I am a little bit gleeful regarding the FGES this morning... in fact I am sniggering away in a disgustingly dastardly fashion... but I better not say too much. This is a delicate phase of the operation.

Sxxx

Scarlet Blue said...

Dave: Where have you been?? Are you implying that I have competition for your compliments???
This will not do.

Mitzi: It's surprising where that vitamin S turns up!

Mr Awkward: Happy New Year!!!
I play so I can pay...

Fairyhedgehog: Happy New Year!!! I wouldn't mind but I still feel squiffed and it's now two days later.

Macy: Happy New Year!!! Yes, that was a particulary good shot of me.

Happyfroggy: I hear that you had a pretty good time too!
Happy New Year!!!

Miss Nations: Indeed, it was wonderful!
Is six dollars and 52 cents a lot of money? Could I buy a house... or a car?

MJ: x2 It's no good, I have decided that I can't be bought... although the 72 cents bit does sound tempting.

Yes, I have seen the post!! That's exactly how it was!!

Sxxx

Scarlet Blue said...

Wendy: Happy New Year!!!
Yes I have vague recollections of an eighties transgression on New Year's Eve. It's a pity that I wasn't camaflaged. [Google suggests camouflaged, but what does Google know?]

Mr Kinky: I think the elephant would be a bit of a struggle... Happy New Year, Mr Kinky!!

K: I didn't describe the beverage properly... it was like a creamy lump hanging in a cherry liquor...
I will keep an eye on the nibbles.

Nota Bene: ...or can I call you Note Well? My poor camera is ancient... and I didn't trust myself to take my new one.

Mr Beastie: I can assure you that nothing fell out of my knickers. The extra strong snappy elastic held up all night and I didn't even suffer any gusset fatigue.
Maybe Dave has been following me???

Sxxx

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Is that an electric blue Mavis in the far distance of that photo? I do hope she wasn't plugged into the mains for her performance.

Sounds like it was, on the whole, a splendid evening! Perhaps not remembering all of it is a blessing?

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Devine: Yep, but I have a rather annoying memory of pretending to play a keyboard... sigh.

You will be pleased to know that the plan to secure safe return of the FGES is well under way.

Sxxxx

Pat said...

I hope you have recovered. Your Nokia can't be that ancient if it takes photos. Mine is antediluvian.

MJ said...

Did you give Mr. Beastie a wedgie for me?

The Unbearable Banishment said...

Late to the party. As usual.

I love that photo. Intentional or not, it's a piece of modern art.

As a testament to your popularity and how closely you're followed, you were able to generate 20 comments in you last post simply with a series of question marks. That's fantastic.

eroswings said...

Now that's a fantastic way to celebrate the New Year: a meet, greet, and lots of drinks! Sounds like y'all had a blast!!!

BEAST said...

I didnt Mr E.....I had to do the washing up :-(

nick said...

I thought gusset fatigue was an exclusively male phenomenon. After all, a man's gusset is under a lot of strain while a lady's has nothing to trouble it.

LL Cool Joe said...

Sounds like a perfect evening then, even if you don't remember much about it.

Happy New Year to you!

Scarlet Blue said...

Pat: I still wouldn't say I was 100%... but that might be to do with staying up late and watching The Godfather.... and not really following it.

MJ: In all the excitement I think I forgot... next time!

Mr Banish: It's not a bad photo as abstracts go! I think people come here for the stunning photography.

Mr Swings: It was a blast... next time you're in the UK you will have to come along and join in the fun.

Mr Beastie: Yes, but I seem to remember spending quite a bit of time with you up the back passage having a fag.
And then I tried to give you a big snog at midnight... but you ran away.

Nick: I am a woman! And what goes on in my gusset is my own business.

Mr Cool: It was indeed, a perfect evening.

Sx

Scarlet Blue said...

...and, as an after-thought, Nick, what goes on in my gusset, stays in my gusset.
Sx

Clyde said...

It sounds like such a wonderful night, of course made better by your attendance.
I was wondering if the nibbles included nuts--not all people are inclined to nibble on nuts, but some really enjoy them--especially with some sort of condiment

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Clyde: Oh, don't worry, there was plenty of sauce!
Sx

BEAST said...

Crikey , I was sober and it wasnt me you tried to snog............

Kevin Musgrove said...

Coo lummee!

Sorry for the late compliments of the season. Have a good 2011 kid.

Once your head stops ringing.

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Beastie: Oh!!

Kev: Happy New Year, to you too!

Sx

63mago said...

Who was the victim of the snoggle attack then?

nursemyra said...

Happy New Year Scarlet

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Mags: Was it you?

Nurse Myra: And a very Happy New Year to you!!

Sxx

Homo Escapeons said...

That would have been a magical evening. I was sick and miserable and today is the last day of penis'illin' to thwart my streptococcal infection! The 12 days of Sickness.

I did manage to stay up until midnight but the sight of Dick Clark made me run for the covers...his facial skin is pulled back so tight he could have been in the movie Brazil!

All the best in 2011..I was going to say new decade but that happened last year.

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Coppens: I just typed out a very long reply to your comment... and Blogger ate it. The reply was of a personal nature and featured Jimmy Tarbuck...
Anyhow, have a fab New Year and I look forward to receiving the FGES...
Sx