Monday, 7 February 2011

Ding Dong . . .

Recently I have been wallowing in blogging nostalgia. Nostalgia can sometimes be overwhelming. But anyhow, whatever... here is one of my elderly posts, originally posted here without the accompanying Youtube, as back then I didn't know how to embed.



I've been quite taken with the new perfume ad from Avon - Avon U by Ungaro. It features Avon Global Ambassador, Reese Witherspoon, looking stunning in a sheath of peach satin. She takes an old fashioned elevator (like the one in Fatal Attraction - where Glenn Close has her way with Micheal Douglas) up to the roof-top of a very tall building. It's dark and a little too breezy because her hair is getting all messed up (she should have gone to L'Oreal). Here she is joined by a tall dark attractive man in a dinner jacket, looking nonchalantly shaken but not too stirred. Perhaps he has lost a mint in the neighbouring Casino because his bow tie is hanging loosely around his collar; or perhaps he has a box of Milk Tray stuffed down his trousers, he is that type of guy. As the couple look longingly at each other a voice over cuts across the scene and says: 'What happens next is up to U to decide' . . . . Well obviously the Cactus Kid turns up with his underage pregnant girlfriend and he shares out bottles of 'Oasis' before they all fly off in a passing helicopter. Several years later they crash land into the penultimate episode of 'Lost' where they swap partners at least four times, have six children, one porcupine and an African Violet between them. On day 3,046 they are all evicted but still manage to live happily ever after, thanks to the exclusive magazine deals with 'Hello', 'OK', 'Gardener's World' and 'The People's Friend'. Then a nice Avon lady rings my doorbell, I let her in and she sells me a pink heart shaped 'Soap-on-a-Rope' . . .

I need to get out more.

Of course, this post made more sense in 2008 when I'd become fixated by the loathsome 'Oasis' adverts. Ever since writing this post I have searched in vain for the VW Casino man advert. Today I found it.

60 comments:

CyberPete said...

Yay first!

MJ said...

perhaps he has a box of Milk Tray stuffed down his trousers

Isn’t that Dave’s Modus operandi?

MJ said...

Damn that CyberPete.

Scarlet Blue said...

Pete: Blimey!

MJ: I think Dave favours a pair of chocolate oranges.

Sx

CyberPete said...

I love the Tresor in love by Lancome perfume commercial. There's also the Chanel one that's just perfect! Oh and j'adore by Dior with that actress with the legs that just seem to go on forever (so j'jealous of that!)

Scarlet Blue said...

Pete: The cold harsh reality is this!
Sx

CyberPete said...

Not for me. This is my reality

xl said...

I'm wondering if that U stuff could help me decide with six of nine lotto numbers to pick?

Dave said...

Oy!! I can see what you're writing you know.

It's a Curly Wurly, if you must know.

CyberPete said...

Oh hai XL

xl said...

Oh Hai Pete!

Scarlet Blue said...

Pete: When I think of Jean Paul Gaultier I think of Antoine Clunes... which inevitably leads to Eurotrash!

Mr XL: I'd ask the VW Casino man if I were you!

Dave: Oh come now... you're two chocolate oranges and a Yorkie bar short of a Cadbury's Creme Egg.

Pete and Mr XL: Oh Hai! Everyone.

Sx

kyknoord said...

He probably stuffed the Milk Tray box in sideways. No wonder he lost a mint.
Probably lost a coffee creme, too.

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Kinky: He was trying to get someone to play with his Hazelnut Whirl.
Sx

Pat said...

I wish I could find a perfume I really like. They seem to have lost the knack.

Eryl said...

I like the casino man's hair, and I wish Golfs still looked like that, I'd buy one.

Pat, try Miller Harris, they make the only perfumes I'm not allergic to.

Nota Bene said...

Oh I saw thought that was going to be the Paula Hamilton ad....

nick said...

It's totally unlikely that any self-respecting gal would be so welcoming to a shadowy figure glimpsed on a fire escape. She's more likely to run for it in case he's a serial killer whose speciality is women on fire escapes. There again, the man may hate U by Ungaro so much he's the one who runs for it.

CyberPete said...

I LOVED Eurotrash haha

Kevin Musgrove said...

I like that sigh of relief she gave on finding an affordable roofer to fix those tiles.

LL Cool Joe said...

Damn I can't see your videos. :/ Just a nice empty space on the page.

BEAST said...

I loved Eurotrash . Sister Bendy was a f as was favourite as was the late Lola Ferrari and her trampoline

Happy Frog and I said...

I love the fact that I have never been able to look at ads the same again since I first saw your blog. I don't know how you get your ideas but I am so glad you do!

63mago said...

A fucking GOLF???

Pat said...

Eryl: Miller Harris sounds like a fifties school master. I'll look out for it. I suppose it would be useful to have a perfume you weren't allergic to. We could bump into each other any day:)

The Unbearable Banishment said...

I've never found Reese Witherspoon to be all that attractive but I'll have to admit that what you've unearthed has forced me to reexamine my position. She'll be glad to know.

Scarlet Blue said...

Pat: Have you tried Estee Lauder White Linen? I also quite like Pleasures. But my all time favourite is by Issey Miyake.

Eryl: Do you remember when VW badges kept being stolen from the cars because of the fashion for wearing them on chains? It was a trend started by the Beastie Boys... nothing to do with our current Mr Beastie.
I will also check out Miller Harris.

Nota Bene: Another fine ad... and the Paula Hamilton advert has been on Youtube for ages... it gave me hope that the Casino man would eventually turn up.

Nick: The Avon ad could have so easily turned into a slasher flick. Or Reese could have done a turn as a vampire as vampires are popular these days.

Pete: Yeah, so did I... I think my eyes were often on stalks!

Kev: Of course, not only is the wind messing up her hair but it's also blown the tiles off!

Sx

MJ said...

But my all time favourite is by Issey Miyake.

Mistress MJ wears L'Eau d'Issey!

Does this mean we smell the same?

Scarlet Blue said...

MJ: Yes! We smell the same! And obviously we both have exceptionally good taste.
Sx

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Cool: Yep, that happens to me sometimes... on my own blog. Damn Youtubes....

Right, I need a fag....

Sx

MJ said...

If we both smell the same, then how is Donn to tell us apart when he's blindfolded?

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr Beastie: Did you know that Lolo's breast implants were reputed to be designed by an engineer who was involved with the design of the Boeing 747?

Happyfroggy: When watching telly and I see an ad that I've done I always smile enigmatically.

Mr Mags: Language!!!

Pat: So long as it's nothing to do with Mrs Miller!

Mr Banish: Reese mailed me this morning. She is thrilled and asked me to pass on her contact details.

Sx

Scarlet Blue said...

MJ: Erm... I will wear my best hat so that he can identify me.
Sx

MJ said...

Didn't you wear that at the Royal Ascot?

Scarlet Blue said...

MJ: How many times... THIS isn't me!!!!
Sx

MJ said...

Ha! Beast and Mr. C. out for a stroll.

Are you really Kate Middleton, Miss Scarlet?

Scarlet Blue said...

MJ: Crikey, have those rumours re-surfaced again?
Hold on a moment... I have a corgi clinging to my leg....
Sx

K said...

I must apologise that I haven't popped round for a while.
Oh, yes I remember the days before we could embed. How much simpler life was and how well you described the advert. Being an Avon lady myslef I am very familiar with U and I can tell you what happens next is a grumpy middle aged woman turns up with it at your door in a paper bag and demands money.

KEVIN JACKSON said...

and you're picking me up on a pair or old posts!

Scarlet Blue said...

Kerrie: Do you still sell the soap on a rope?
It's always a pleasure to see you whether you are carrying a brown paper bag or not.

Mr Kevin: I intend to go further, Mr Kevin, by Christmas I will have Scarlet's Guide to Knackered Old Posts ready for publication. It will feature the lamp post I looked out on from my childhood bedroom and my first gas bill.

Sx

Pat said...

Girls : no two ladies smell the same no matter what perfume they wear.
Estee Lauder's Youth Dew nearly put me off for life but I'm tempted by L'eau d'Issey to give it a try - with two such illustrious users.

Scarlet Blue said...

Pat: That's very true! I'm sure my slather of cocoa butter every morning probably interferes with my Issey.
Yes, Pat, give the Issey a squirt and please report back with your findings.
Sx

normadesmond said...

avon, really?

nursemyra said...

Peaches must be much redder in your part of the world than mine Miss Scarlet

Mitzi said...

I swear by The Bodyshop's Mango Body Butter. It's a winter skin saver. Slap it on for a rosy glow!

Scarlet Blue said...

Miss Norma: Not for me, obviously! Unless it's a soap on a rope....

Miss Nurse: Indeed! No, I used to write the advert posts from memory and I saw peach and not red!
Just goes to show how fallible memory is.

Mitzi: I've been trying to wean myself off Palmer's Cocoa butter for years... but I seem to like smelling like a Galaxy bar!

Sx

andrea said...

Holy guacamole, there's even more fun here in the comments than in the post! Not only that, all the Milk Tray comebacks are already spoken for. As for blog nostalgia, I see a few names I once knew, back when I had a "fun blog", too. (After switching URLs it's all boring work-related stuff now. Seduced by Facebook for the fun stuff -- mostly because our dear friend Homo Escapeons resides there.)

K said...

No soap on a rope I am afraid but we do body butter on a stick.
I also have to agree with Mitzi, I too have discovered the joys of Mango Body Shop butter.

Pearl said...

I don't care when you wrote it, that was perfect. :-)

Pearl

Madame DeFarge said...

I can almost smell it from here. Avon never come calling here. M. DeFarge scares them away with his manly odour.

xl said...

Miss Scarlet, be my Valentine!

MJ said...

Miss Scarlet: Read XL's comment on my "Pink Party" blog before you accept his Valentine proposal!

MJ said...

That should say, on my Pink Party blog POST.

Scarlet Blue said...

Andrea: Hello and Welcome!
Yes, I'm only on FB to keep an eye on the wayward bloggers such as Mr Coppens. I have tried, but I can't lure him back.

Kerry: I have now put the Body Shop mango body butter on my list. I will report back my findings.

Pearl: You are very kind and you made me smile.

Madame D: Be careful, I think Avon is moving into the male market...? Kerry will know.

Mr XL: I am in a huff with you, Mr XL, this is exactly the same Valentine greeting that you gave me last year... and even then it wasn't exactly exclusive.
Tart.

MJ: I have issued a stern warning to Mr XL and hopefully he will shame at his chastisement.
Let us hope that we don't have a repeat performance of this wanton behaviour next year.
I bet there is a Pink Party Blog out there somewhere....

SXXXXXXXX

Scarlet Blue said...

*feel* shame....

My mind moves quicker than my fingers.
Sx

xl said...

I hope to attend the Vicars & Tarts Soirée later this season.

Scarlet Blue said...

Mr XL: I'm glad you are here as I've just had a very confused moment over at yours. You will see, as I outed my stupidity.
Sx

Scarlet Blue said...

Did my last comment rhyme or am I still confused?
Sx

Nikos said...

"Did you know that Lolo's breast implants were reputed to be designed by an engineer who was involved with the design of the Boeing 747?"


That would be Howard Hughes's younger brother whoever Lolo is.

xsN

PS

I think that engineer should be spelt with an "E".

Scarlet Blue said...

Nikos: Was he an an engineer specialising in E cups?
Sx