Tuesday, 31 August 2010

A Problem Shared Is Public Property

Evidently I have hit the 10,000 mark on my meter, which means it is time for a post, but I find myself sadly lacking in the post department - all my energies have been directed elsewhere - I am drained. All I am fit for is the bath chair on the patio.
I am also a little drained because I have been mulling over a serious problem. It gave me a headache for three days and then I decided that I was bored with having a headache and so I shrugged it off and, for the time being, have stopped thinking about it. All the thinking in the world isn't going to change anything - apart from adding to the depth of my frown lines, and I've always been of the mind that a problem shared is a problem doubled; possibly quadrupled; tabloid potential; blackmail fodder; a future soap storyline. So I stick my head in the sand and hope that I am wrong about 'the problem', which is a bit daft, cos I am seldom wrong.
Sigh. What would Deirdre Barlow do? Obviously the first thing she would do is wrestle the cellophane wrapping from a packet of Silk Cut and nip out into the backyard to have a fag. So that's what I will do. And then I will change my role model...


I think that in future that I should save my imagination for fiction. All is now resolved and I am about to tuck into lashings of humble pie... but at least my headache has gone.
Right... 10,000 words to write before the next post....

Monday, 9 August 2010

Joined Up Words

I have started doing this:-

I'm sure you've all seen these meters littered around the blogosphere and you all know what they mean. Yes, I am trying to assemble 80,000 words together to make a coherent whole.
The central character is Carol, an out of work dentist from Harrow who’s dumped herself on Wayne, a billionaire playboy from Wigan. A scuffle down Fanny's Lane ensues closely followed by a mysterious incident on Blotched Bottom Common involving the Littlehampton Confectionery Display Team. It reaches its climax with a death defying escapade on top of a haystack in a field just off the A30 [sorry Dave, but I do kiss and tell].
As you can tell, this is to be a well researched historical/romantic novel.

Progress is slow and I really need all my powers of concentration, and a huge dollop of discipline, to get it done.

I will write my next blog post when I hit 10,000, or when I get fed up with trying. I will also still be keeping an eye on you all.

Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast!

Tuesday, 3 August 2010

What to wear on a Blog Meet

We had arranged to meet by the third haystack on the right in a field just off the A30 at five minutes past midnight. What could be simpler? So that we would recognise each other Dave was to wear his purple smoking jacket, a pink carnation and his dog collar [I like a man in a uniform]. I suggested that he also wore trousers or shorts. I was to be attired in a suitable outfit - my favourite ditsy print red rubber play suit teamed with Bordello red patent stilettos and black stockings. You could say that I was fully girded for his much lauded sermon on the mount. We had both been looking forward to our blog meet for weeks; intense comment flirtation within our boxes had heightened and aroused our expectations - we were like two lively Labradors ready to be unleashed - both fevered with excitement at the prospect of our imminent union. But the best laid plans often go awry; how was I to know that on the same night that Dave and I had arranged to meet that a vicars and tarts party would be in full swing by the third haystack on the right in a field just off the A30....
I wonder if Dave has any pictures?